Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Jewish Haiku :)

"After the warm rain, the sweet smell of camellias: Did you wipe your feet?
Her lips near my ear, bubbeh whispers the name of her friend's disease.
Looking for pink buds to prune, the old mohel wanders among his flowers.
Scrabble discord: Someone has placed "putzhead" on a triple word score.
Testing the warm milk on her wrist, she sighs softly. But her son is forty.
Tea ceremony: fragrant steam perfumes the air. Try the cheese Danish.
Lacking fins or tail, the gefilte fish swims with great difficulty.
My nature journal: Today I saw some trees and birds. I should know the names?
Like a bonsai tree, your terrible posture at my dinner table.
The same kimono the top geishas are wearing, got it at John Lewis.
The sparrow brings too many worms for her young. 'Force yourself,' she chirps.
Jewish triathlon: gin rummy, then contract bridge, followed by a nap.
Umbilical cord: 'Can't you just leave it?' the new Jewish mother asks.
The shivah visit: So sorry about your loss. Now back to my problems.
Our youngest daughter, our most precious jewel. Hence the name, Tiffany.
Concert of car horns as we debate the question of when to change lanes.
Sorry I'm not home to take your call. At the tone please state your bad news.
Is one Nobel Prize so much to ask from a child after all I've done?
Today, mild shvitzing. Tomorrow, so hot you'll plotz. Five-day forecast: feh.
Left the door open for the Prophet Elijah. Now our cat is gone.
Yenta. Shmeer. Gevalt. Shlemiel. Shlimazl. Tochis. Oy! To be fluent!
A lovely nose ring -- excuse me while I put my head in the oven.
Hard to tell under the lights--white Yarmulke or male-pattern baldness? "


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